Call Me Lucky

Things have been going well for me lately. A little too well. And this makes me nervous. The new job, the tasty redundancy cheque, Arsenal in the Champions League Final, the 100-1 horse coming in… I thought I was the eternal optimist, but then I don’t normally have this much luck. It made me realise that when you’re flying high, you’re at some point going to run out of fuel, then there’s nothing much to look forward to other than a horrific fiery death.

I was absolutely convinced that I was going to crash and burn today. In the morning I had a dentist’s appointment scheduled to have my tooth rebuilt, and in the afternoon I was having a mole examined to see if it was cancerous. You couldn’t pick a horror movie with a better premise.

The hour at the dentist went without a glitch. The only bit of excitement was when I dribbled down my front, but the new tooth looks fantastic (compared to the others at any rate, which as Marilisa points out, should be owned by National Heritage). This, I figured, meant that I was definitely going to have cancer. But half an hour with a dermatologist and there was no hard evidence that my mole was going to consume me alive.

The one thing that struck me as slightly odd was that the dermatologist didn’t use a normal camera to photograph my mole. He used his mobile phone. Which he then sent to the printer via Bluetooth. I have also noticed that Vodafone adverts are appearing on every webpage I visit. Then it struck me - I’m cursed. I’m going to be followed by Vodafone wherever I go for all eternity. I knew all this luck had to come at a price. So if anyone knows how to break a curse inflicted by a mobile phone giant, can you text it to me please? Thnx.