End of the Great British Night Out
- Rape is a despicable crime and while I can’t begin to imagine how horrifying the ordeal is for the victim, I can understand why it’s often so difficult for them to come forward and see the case go to trial.
- The percentage of rape cases that lead to convictions is staggeringly low and while some of these may be false claims, there are a lot of men getting away with it. Something needs to be done to help the genuine cases reach a satisfactory verdict.
However.
The Government’s proposal yesterday that any woman too drunk to give consent is in fact being raped makes me very worried. Many of my early sexual experiences were drunken fumblings after a heavy night out. More often than not, the young lady and I regretted our actions the following morning, but I can tell you - we were both well into it the night before. Should this law come into place, it is virtually a license for a woman to go to the police and report a rape if she laments her actions of the previous evening. It means that the guys who go to clubs and bars need to give every girl a wide berth if they’ve had so much as a Bacardi Breezer - even if they’re coming on like a steam engine - for fear of criminal action the following day. And what if the guy’s steaming drunk? It works both ways, you know. At university, I was literally dragged out of a club by two Swedish girls (no, I’m not making this up) who wanted to take me off and do depraved things to me. I was smashed, and it took three of my mates to separate me from said vixens and take me back home to bed. I haven’t spoken to the bastards since. But seriously – it’s very dangerous ground. And I know I’m going to make some enemies here – but surely the girl in question has a duty to remain sober enough to be in control of her own actions? I’m not talking about cases with Rohypnol or shit like that, I’m talking about good old-fashioned “let’s get bladdered” nights out with the girls.
I fully appreciate that I’m coming at this from a bloke’s point of view, but we have a problem with alcohol in this country, and suddenly sending all the guys who’ve had a fumble into the slammer is not the way to solve it. Nor is it the way to convict the increasing number of men who are getting away with violent rape. I’m afraid it’s back to the drawing board.
posted by Matt at 7:41 AM
5 Comments:
If waking up next to someone you don't remember sleeping with constitutes rape, then I've been violated fucking loads of times.
and not once by a stunner...
funny that.
you say a girl should stay sober enough to control her own actions. Shouldn't a bloke also exercise control over his own actions by not taking advantage of someone so drunk that there is no way that she knows what she is doing?
I understand where you are coming from but surely there is nothing wrong with a drunken girls night out. So long as you don't bump into some pig headed ass hole who believes that its all your own fault because your not 'controlling your own actions'.
Being slightly tipsy so you make an error in judgement is not the same as being so drunk you're falling asleep half way through but the bloke is still carrying. The latter is obviously rape.
anon - You make some good points, but I've been so drunk that I've fallen asleep during sex before and it didn't mean I was being raped. There's a very easy way to stop it happening - just stop drinking when you know you've had enough.
actually, if you fall asleep and someone has sex with you that IS rape. It you look at S75(d) of the Sexual Offences Act 2003 you will see that if the offender does the relevant act (ie rape) and the complainant was asleep or otherwise unconscious and the offender knew this then the offence of rape has been committed.
Matt as you are a man you cannot be raped, unless that is of course you were having sex with a man the time you fell asleep during sex.
Sex is a continuing act adn you may withdraw the consent at any time, even half way through. Falling asleep acts as an automatic withdrawl of consent and I think this is what the law is getting at. Obviously a drunken mistake will not act as a withdrawl of consent if it is a conscious drunken fumble.
I do however agree that men and women should stop drinking when they know they have had enough. But there's no point in pretending that some women don't go out to drink to excess and probably intend to not know what they are doing, but this does not put on the sirens saying 'rape me'.
As has already been pointed out, most rapists go unconvicted, even more rapes go unreported. Something has to be done to encourage victims to report these horrible crimes.
that is right. also rape is all about consent. if you consent to someone carrying on having sex with you when you fall asleep then it cant be rape.
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